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August 19 We are Going to See This Photo EVERYWHERE!!!Enviable career ahead:
My advice to Michael Phelps: Marry a girl with GOOD GENES and then you two will create a SUPER-BABY and future Olympic champion to carry on the crown into your future generations.
~ HE DID IT FIRST THOUGH ~ Stud Muffins... LAMS
P.S.: Just think next week at this time the Olympics will all be over with and we'll have to be watching the Democratic National Convention. How anti-climactic is that? Hot sports figures in exchange for political figures. Bummer! NO! That is a MASSIVE BUMMER!
What is Going on at the Olympics This Year? PG-13 EntryThis is probably a questionable blog entry from me...
... so let's "dive right in" shall we?
I have been watching the Olympics for many years now and I am noticing something this year that I have not noticed in prior years. Now, granted, there have always been "lumps and bumps" on the male gymnasts and the male figure skaters with their tight little outfits and costumes. But this year there are blatant and distinctive outlines of men's parts and they're flopping around in rhythmic actions from one leg -- flop -- over to the other leg -- of every kind of peen you can imagine: Big, small, short, so-so, etc. I know I have not become a dirty old woman, and it even occured to me that I was becoming a perv. But I do not have X-Ray vision and I am not a total perv, and the things I'm saying I'm seeing are really there flopping around as big as life for all to see. It became crystal clear to me this evening that there is a new "trend" going on. I was watching the men's springboard diving event and this "tendency" seemed to encompass everyone competing. You cannot help but notice this with the camera angles they provide for you. I think that the media is doing this on purpose: To get that "money" shot. There is much evidence is you look. Here are just a few examples:
 Germany's Jan Frodeno wins the men's triathlon.
 Jan Frodeno of Germany wins the triathlon
 Men's triathlon (I call this "the Peen Count")
 Canadian diver Alexandre Despatie performs in the men's 3m springboard
 Qin Kai of China competes in the men's 3m springboard diving semi-finals
PLEASE DON'T SAY, "OH LORI, ONLY YOU WOULD NOTICE THIS!" It is impossible to miss, don't you think so too?
 Michael Phelps, the fish: That is the million dollar peen shot.
WHY ARE THEY GIVING ME FODDER FOR MY BLOG???
 France's Frederic Belaubre competes in the men's triathlon (nothing here, he's just cute).
See? Isn't it nice to have a little something left to the imagination?
The women too are subject to crotch shots this year more so than prior years as well. The women have been well covered up with extra layers in the places that count. But then, it is my opinion that women are pickier about their looks, costuming and gear than the men are I believe. And certainly more so too knowing they are going to be all over the television. (The men are just a bunch of exhibitionists.) I have seen no cooch action thus far, but the press are definitely trying!
 Viorica Tigau of Romanian long jump
 Yumilka Ruiz of Cuba falls during the quarter finals women's volleyball against Serbia
So, back to my original question: Where are the jock straps or tape or some discretion coverup paraphernalia pads -- or whatever it is you use to hold yourselves in place. Don't the coaches direct their athletes to do this? Like, for instance, when they are practicing or training, shouldn't the coach say, "Hey, man, your dealios are flapping around way too much. Cover that stuff up, it's indecent!?" Am I missing something? Am I weird to post this peen and poon post? Are these athletes naive? Are we in such a society where the flopping peen from leg to leg for all to see is a good thing? I don't know. I mean... page down and look at that shot of Mark Spitz in his Speedo - there is NOTHING at all. SEE WHAT I SPEAK OF?
 *Thinking and pondering*  *Wipes sweat off* So, anyway, I watched the Americans play China in baseball and it was full of old fashioned drama! First of all, they all had their "stuff" covered up properly. The Chinese pitcher threw the ball and hit our batter in the right kidney. Out batter glared angrily at the Chinese pitcher as he took his base. When our batter was coming into home base, he aimed at the catcher and TOOK HIM OUT (tackled him) in a big way. The catcher went FLYING with facemask and gear also thrown off and airborne. This prompted their coach (an American) to come running out and get in the umpires face. He proceded to bombard said umpire with a barrage of 4-letter cuss words and kicking up dust. After his tirade, he was ejected from the game. Then our next batter came up and the pitcher threw the ball and hit our batter in the head. He fell to the ground. He was taken to the hospital and treated for a minor concussion and is doing fine now. In total 6 of our players were hit by baseballs. America won the baseball game 9-1.
GO AMERICA'S BASEBALL TEAM!
It is too bad that they have cancelled baseball and softball from the next Olympics. It is being said that these sports are being cancelled because America's teams are unstoppable and no one can even compete with us.
GO AMERICA!
Congratulations to these fellas! I watched their race and it was a fun one! They finished an easy one, two, three. They made me smile during their interview. They were gentlemanly and articulate during their interview, and they all concluded that they are blessed and I liked that. Then when the interview ended, they broke into their fun, normal, everyday street gangsta selves... I don't know how else to word it properly. "Hey mama! Hey brotha, we comin' home!" etc... Like I said, they made me smile and that's not a bad thing.
 Kerron Clement, silver, Bershawn Jackson, bronze, and Angelo Taylor, gold, celebrate after the men's 400-meter hurdles final on Monday
They did well and all, but note that they are rockin' the current "trend," for which this blog entry is about. Fortunately, there's a large American flag available for Mr. Taylor. Notice that I said large. OK... don't get mad at me for stereotyping!
 Peace and Love from Lori LAMS
 Tuesday afternoon update: Click HERE if you are interested in reading about bringing a sexier image to the world of women's table tennis. I guess that it explains a little bit about what it is I am seeing this year. Also, the Mexican sychronized swimmers have been barred from wearing sexy swimsuits with lights sewn in that makes them like a Christmas tree. It was deemed to have too much flash.
Tueday evening update: I just watched the men's springboard competition and do you know what? The NBC camera crew were much more responsible this evening in that they did not do what they did last night (and what prompted this entry): That is to focus or zoom in on the entire jump prior to the dive, then all can and will be seen. What the camera crew did this evening was pan in and out at certain moments. So when the "action" is happening the camera is panned out far enough away so you see the dive but far enough away to not see outlines and flopping. When the "visual moment" has passed the camera zooms in (where it was all yesterday) for the closeup of the dive and thereby bypassing the MONEY shot for their primetime TV audience. Don't be too disappointed, I'm sure there's photos aplenty splattered all over the internet.
Now, that is news isn't it? Moi.
August 17 Supercalifragilisticexpialidotious Is The Word To Use!WHAT a day at the Summer Olympics! Mark Spitz's record has been shattered by Michael Phelps with his 8 gold medals. The announcers were wondering about appropriate words to describe this indescribable young man. I have the word and it is:
Supercalifragilisticexpialidotious!
 CONGRATULATIONS to Michael Phelps, the PHISH! New FACEBOOK PHENOM TOO!
"WOW!" doesn't really seem to express the enormity of his accomplishment! Congratulations to the mega-olympian, phenom and phish, Michael Phelps. I suppose I have to eat my shorts now. And YES, I will use sauce.
Then I was watching the women's marathon. This woman, Constantina Tomescu of Romania (pictured below), had quite a lead over anybody else in the pack so the cameras were following her. With about 10 miles left, she reached into her bra, took out something (smelling salts, or something) and completely snorted it! Then you could see her do the nose suck in thing that people do after they snort something. She also reached into her bra and pulled out, according to the announcer, some kind of carbohydrate protein gel to chew on. I mean, I thought I was watching Amy Winehouse in action and not a potential gold medal champion! It seemed very strange and wrong.
Here's my problem: With the International Olympic Committee being super anal about any kind of doping or enhancements, why is this woman snorting and ingesting ANYTHING (but water) during the race? I mean, athletes can hardly even take cold medicine without being positive for some banned substance. Even the announcer commented that that was strange and that he'd never seen such a thing. Why wasn't this woman immediately ejected and disqualified for snorting something during the race? Why wasn't that container tested to see what's in it? No wonder she was so far ahead of anybody else. I do not mean to imply anything, but I'm just saying that to pull something out of your running bra and snorting it on TV doesn't look good, and I want to know why nobody else is saying anything about this.
I also wish to add that this is NOT FAIR to those other women runners who ran the race WITHOUT snorting up anything. If this woman has some kind of medical issue that requires snortin' up something, SHE SHOULD NOT BE RUNNING IN THE OLYMPICS. This is what you TRAIN for months in advance for. TAKE THE MEDAL AWAY DAMMIT! If the IOC took her medal the race would be: 1) Ethiopia, 2) China and 3) China. USA wasn't even close to medal, so that has nothing to do with this. I WANT IT FAIR -- THIS WAS NOT FAIR! NO ONE SHOULD BE SNORTING ANYTHING DURING AN OLYMPIC EVENT! You use JUST YOUR BODY with NO HELP. PERIOD. Plain and simple isn't it?
 Constantina Tomescu of Romania crosses the finish line winning the Women's Marathon Final
(CHECK HER BRA!!!)
Does anybody else agree with me regarding sniffing something during competition? I mean, REALLY NOW, something's wrong with that.
Also this evening I was watching the women weightlifters as they were weightlifting, and they frighten me... uff they are big women. The weight they were lifting was like hoisting a refrigerator over our heads. They are massive, MASSIVE women.
One more thing: While scanning the city and sites of Beijing, NBC quickly scanned over a beautiful sculpture that I was immediately attacted to. Upon doing my research I found that it is called "Torch Relay." It is enormous and it dwarfs those standing near it. For instance, if we were standing next to it, we would come up to the calf areas of the runners. I'm impressed by the seemingly flowing fabric and fluid motion even though it's made out of steel or something.
As I was looking around for what this was I found pictures of the Olympic Sculpture Park, where this sculpture stands, and also the Olympic Gardens. I posted them in the new photo album up above and they will be there for this last week of the Olympics, then I'll remove them. But for this week, I hope you take a moment and enjoy the beauty of the art they have erected. I know if I were there I would have to visit these places!
 "Torch Relay"
Well there you have it: My official congrats to Michael Phelps
 . A rant about the Romanian marathoner inhaling and ingesting weird things while racing. And, last but not least, the beauty of the Olympic sculptures and gardens!Have a wonderful Sunday!
Peace and Love from Lori LAMS
August 15 Yup, More Olympics ChatterCongratulations to our women gymnasts, Nastia Liukin who takes home a gold medal in women's all around and Shawn Johnson who takes home the silver! They were (are) beautiful, daring and fluid in movement. They were almost error-free in their routines and THAT'S WHY THEY WON! YAY! China took home the bronze.
 Nastia Liukin and Shawn Johnson
 Nastia Liukin while performing on the balance beam
5'2 and 99 pounds!!! She has great form doesn't she?
SIGH... I was that size in like the 7th grade.
Can you imagine what the future holds for Nastia, Shawn, AND THAT FISH, Michael Phelps? All the endorsements that will be coming their way?
 Lucky them.Tomorrow is the big Big-Foot press conference too. STAY TUNED YOU FELLOW CRYPOZOOLOGISTS!
And also on a personal note: My son, Stephen, daughter-in-law, Melissa and new grandbaby, Christian, whom I've never met, will be home at the end of next month! Stephen will be stateside for training and everyone is coming home finally! After training, he will take a much anticipated leave and visit everyone finally. I'm so excited!
Peace and Love from Lori LAMS
August 13 I wish I Were a Paleontologist or Anthropologist or Something: CRYPTOZOOLOGIST! YEA!Or whatever it is called that studies strange animals (it is CRYPTOZOOLOGIST! VOILA! Thank you Adrian! The word just was not coming to me! I'M GETTING OLD!). So: I wish I were a CRYPOZOOLOGIST, because if you know anything about me you know I'm intrigued by the weirdness of life (in general) and especially the strange, mutant creatures that live among us on a daily basis.
The Chupacabra is one such creature. I don't think that it is anything other than a hybred between a pit-bull terrior and a manged wolf. Or it has something boar-like about it too. Maybe someone, somewhere crossbred a boar and a pit bull to see what would happen? It is obviously a carnivor. The interesting thing about this creature as you watch it running down the road: It seems smallish in nature, but then it turns it's head and his head is enormous! I have no doubt that this is what people are seeing, and now we can all finally see. If the sheriff had not had his high-tech video camera there, what he said would just be hearsay to the rest of us, and we all go, "uh-huh..." and roll our eyes.
You have to see to believe!
Now, if they could only do this with Nessie or Bigfoot! Well, not serving the heads up on a platter... but a good video would do.
by guanabee
This creature reminds me of the dog in "The Mask" movies! After he'd put the mask on, of course.
Wednesday evening update: Three Bigfoot Hunters say they've found a bigfoot carcass and are planning an official press conference this coming Friday. Click HERE to go to their website. The thing is definitely ugly: What did I expect? Rock Hudson? Brad Pitt? George Clooney handsome looking things?
Friday afternoon update: THESE FOLKS are debunking the whole Bigfoot carcass as a HOAX. Today is Friday - the supposed day of supposed press conference. I have not heard a thing about it thus far. That thing in the box absolutely does look like a costume rental. The debunkers have some good points. I was wondering why a bigfoot would allow itself to be found or killed in the first place.
Both of the above linked to websites are experiencing heavy traffic and they may not open up or load.
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